A United States-based Nigerian IT expert, Clayton Udo has raised concerns over the struggles African men face in marriages abroad, particularly in the U.S.
According to Udo, many African men have been financially drained and left in dire conditions by their wives, leading some to flee or even lose their lives due to emotional and financial distress.
Addressing the issue, Udo stated, “A lot of people don’t understand what is going on in the story, or what is going on in this country when it comes to African men. I can tell you that a lot of men have either had to run to Mexico or Canada to escape back to the country. Men have stayed in this country and have been rendered useless; 200k, 300k, money put on their heads by African women. The African women come out on TikTok, Facebook with pictures of them and only the children smiling, with the house they took from the man and everything.”
He further lamented that many African men have suffered similar fates, stating that hundreds have died over the past decade due to these circumstances.
Sharing his own experience, he explained, “When I had my own divorce, you know when you are in IT, you have what is called a recruiter. My ex-wife went to each recruiter reporting me to each and every one of these recruiters, then turned around and went on to these recruiters saying she has finished her own course in IT. By the time I picked up the phone to call the recruiter, they refused to work with me, or they tell me they have now signed her up. And since there is a divorce, there is a clash of interest.”
Udo also accused some women of fabricating abuse claims to gain an advantage in legal disputes, emphasising that many African men have lost everything, including their homes and children, due to such tactics.
“What they do is lie, and that there have been verbal and physical abuse. A lot of them want to become you or be greater than you. Be careful who you are walking around with. They like you for now, that you are driving a car, and you have money, but once you bring them into the house, they want to take everything you have; they want to take and become you.”
He warned African men to be cautious in their marital choices, alleging that many women marry men only as a means to escape poverty and later strip them of their possessions.
“In her mind, she wants to climb up to get out of the poverty she has where she is coming from, she is going to take everything away from you, from your house to your children. The number of men in the U.S. African community that the women have turned their children against, secretly or openly, they are going to take your house from you, they are going to take everything from you. Most men have been reduced to nothing, even though they won’t come out to say it. They are submissive.”